the death of my father had reunited me with my favorite cousin.i haven’t seen him in years and i have missed him so much.
my cousin ben is gay. when we were young, i was acutely aware of his sexuality though at that time i may not have a word to describe it.
this is what i found out recently. when we were young, my cool aunt lucy ( she passed away a long time ago, god always liked the cool ones and leave behind the duds) had given him a barbie doll when he was six years old.ben had always preferred to play with us the girlies while brian his elder brother would play badminton with the boys.
ben devised this game for us to play – it was called room service. he enjoyed serving us tea and coffee. years later, ben’s first job was flight attendant with malaysian airlines. i laughed at him and said – your desire to serve was just bloody hell innate.
i asked him recently so, has your dad met any of your boyfriends?
he laughed and said – if my dad had met my boyfriends, he would have died before your dad.. impossibly funny, that’s my cousin ben. after i went back and thought about what he had said, it broke my heart. it broke my heart because if you cannot share with your family; the little joys in life like what your boyfriend and girlfriend have done for you and they meaning they bring to your life- that’s a real shame.
isn’t funny that for so long, we have known of his sexual preference and yet we can’t openly accept it?
i think given a choice many gay people would have wanted to be heterosexual. i don’t think there is anyone out there who thinks – i’d rather choose a more difficult life and to be gay.
i thought that with the advent of technology and the fact that people travel more than our forefathers – we become more able to tolerate differences but looks like the world is heading the other way. we fear people who are different and challenge our status quo..
if i had a question for everyone in this world it would be – are you living your life exactly the way you wanted it to be? it would be my guess that 90% of us are living a lie.
ellen is not perfect but i salute anyone who are just themselves.